“Suddenly, she froze. There was something coming up the street on the opposite side. It was something black … Something tall and black … Something very tall and very black and very thin.”
The BFG by Roald Dahl
Roald Dahl could have simply revealed what ‘she’ in the story saw straight away, but he chose to reveal only bits and pieces of information to the readers in order to keep them in suspense before the final revelation.
This is an important tip to help your child achieve a climax in his story – by stretching the tension.
A moment of tension can be stretched out in 4 steps:
- Action / Non-action
- Bits of Dialogue
- Character’s thoughts/ feelings/ inner sensations
- 5 senses (what the character saw/ heard/ touched etc.)
Bad example:
Amy fell off the ladder.
Good example:
Amy felt the ladder wobble. “Aargh!” she screamed, throwing out her arms. The room became a sudden blur. Fear gripped her. She tried to grab something but her fingers closed on thin air.
As you can see from the good example, instead of just saying that Amy fell off the ladder, her emotions, what she saw, what she tried to do and so on, expressed. This makes the reader wonder what was going to happen to Amy and feel compelled to read further. This is what contributes to a good story.
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